FINDING The THREAD

In memory,
a THREAD begins to reveal itself.
Ahead are endless, unplanned days.
This wasn’t supposed to happen.


 

FINDING THE THREAD

In memory,

the thread begins to reveal itself.

Ahead are endless, unplanned days.

This wasn’t supposed to happen.

“We have to have a plan”, I told everyone.

But where was my plan?

If I could see ahead just a little,

maybe I could unravel the thread.

 

Walking into our spare bedroom this morning,

the view turned from dark

to sunshine.

A scene exploded in my memory.

 

I could see my father lying on the bed we borrowed

from hospice.

 

We wanted his last days

to be spent with a view of our peaceful world;

the trees,

our flock of sheep,

the horses in the pasture.

 

I hope he loved the quiet scenes before him.

Fall yard

The Lord is my Shepherd…

He makes me to lay down in green pastures. 

He restores my soul”.

 

I hope my Dad’s soul was restored.

He knew what he was facing.

He wouldn’t talk to us about it.

That was his way of dealing

with the impending transition.

(A visiting minister later revealed that Dad had asked him what heaven was like. I think we all may have that question in our hearts.)

 

We visited with Dad as often as we could,

as did many friends

in those last few days.

We could only face the situation

by continuing our daily routines.

He did his best

to honor our game.

 

Dad didn’t retire

until the age of sixty-nine.

It seemed like a grand old age in those years,

but now it seems rather young to me.

He always had a plan,

a routine,

an interest, and a goal.

He was disciplined,

determined,

loving and reliable,

 committed to his family.

 

What about me?

There are many questions;

 not many answers.

I want my life to count for something.

 Have I stopped counting?

 

What happens in the single parent family

when the parental balance

does not exist?

 

What happens to the marriage,

with no plans for commitment?

 

 The last two generations have given us a preview of a very different society.

 

Has the media become the parent?

Is the media making our moral judgments?

Everyone is doing it, and I want to do it too.

 

Blame for bad outcomes can always be affixed to someone,

somewhere,

somehow.

By what moral standards does this new generation make its’ decisions?

 

There is a new intensity in my nightly prayers.

 He is much closer.

 My time to see Him face to face

is much nearer than before.

I’m beginning to see a thread.

 
copyright@2018
Photography By Mary Anne Whitchurch Tuck
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Author: maryannetuck

The future is right ahead of me and new projects seem to beckon... Friends and memories of times past remain with me today. I love to share my stories along with comments and opinions (of course) of today's challenges. Photography is my hobby and opportunities to capture the scenes before me are mine for the taking. Born and raised in Michigan, the peaceful woods and wildlife trails have always attracted me. Graduating from high school in the early fifties, college was of no interest to me. I have learned one important fact about life; whover decided when a person becomes "old"...didn't know what they were talking about...My theory is; you're as old as you think you are....(I'm thinking about it..haven't decided yet.)

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